Today marks one month.

5 months ago, I graduated college.
5 months ago, Pastor Shay asked me to consider moving to Winchester.
4 months ago I once again became a staff member of Camp Cowen, and began to serve a thousand campers and counselors.
3 months ago I struggled with trusting Christ in making an extremely difficult decision.
2 months ago today actually, I posted the blog officially declaring the final decision to pack up all my belongings and be obedient to a journey God had set before me.
1 month ago today, with blind faith, I moved to Winchester, VA. 
And today. Today marks one month of living in Winchester.
It's strange to think that just four months ago, I had no idea I would even be here.

So? What's happened? What's going on in my life? What is God doing? 
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~The Church @ Winchester.

Wow. We have now met 3 times at our location (a school basically in the heart of Winchester) as an official church. Every Sunday the core shows up around 9 and spends an hour or so setting up the school into a meeting place and nursery. I LOVE it. Everyone works so hard, and with each passing Sunday we are becoming faster and more efficient in our set-up and tear-down. Even in the few weeks we have met, we have had several guests and a few new legit attenders. God is doing something in the hearts of the people of Winchester... and it's incredible to see it come to fruition.

I am also finally finding a routine and somewhat understanding of what each week will look like as the children's minister. I love the emphasis on the community, as my favorite way to reach out is to bake for people... (this past week I was able to bake up a storm for the coffee shop lady and her staff. :-))
I eagerly anticipate the weeks ahead as God continues to MAKE THINGS HAPPEN. Also, did I mention how incredible it is to work with a staff that is so legit?? I am so blessed to be part of such sincere and direct accountability.



~My new family and friends.

I find that part of the beauty of being a believer and part of God's family, is that the family is always growing. Even when I leave one area to move to another, I don't just forget or divorce my old church family... I simply add more to the mix and count myself blessed to be a member of God's family. 

That being said, it has been rather difficult leaving my mom and dad. Which seems silly since I left them to go to college and such, but I think that this time is different since there were so many uncertainties and unknowns. I know that they both miss me dreadfully, but are constantly in prayer for my safety and continued obedience to Christ.The most incredible testament to their faith both in God and the use of me in His plan was shown when my mother was asked how she felt about my move to Winchester and such... her reply had been, "I'm scared NOT to let her go..." It brought me such comfort to hear her say it because it was not only accepting that I was not her own (rather belonging to God), but fearing God in trying to hold me back from Him working through me. What an incredible woman. 

I also count myself blessed to have become a part of the Osborne family. I love watching as they faithfully raise their children in Christ... I love observing as they continually grow in their marriage as a couple in Christ.  I feel unbelievably loved and genuinely cared for.
NOT TO MENTION MY NEW CHURCH FAMILY! Amazing. Simply amazing. The friends I have made so far have been beyond wonderful. I feel as though I have known many of them for years; and yet it's only been 4 weeks. They have been so accepting and eager to build relationships. It has made my transition into Winchester as smooth as it could possibly be.

~Life

 Life. What can I even say about it? It has been a whirlwind of an adventure so far... and I don't anticipate that changing anytime soon... ;-)

~God

God is GOD....and i am not. Actually, i'm less than not. i'm nothing. In the past four weeks the Lord as taught me, lead me, humbled me, challenged me, disciplined me, loved me unconditionally, ((did I mention humbled me??? haha))and brought me peace and comfort. It it been in Christ through this uncomfortable move that I have found comfort. Peace that passes all understanding. i have been able to not only feel His presence as though He were sitting right next to me, but also as the Holy Spirit has lead me in discussions and such.... how have i not embraced the power of the Holy Spirit's potential till now??!? It's unbelievable... seriously though... words on a computer screen cannot even begin to express... so let's grab some coffee and chat it out!

~Me

HE must become greater... i must become less.






Until we meet again... 
<3

chick flicks... *groan* uhhh......

Chick flicks and love songs.

(P.S.... this is my 'abridged' love talk just because I prefer to discuss such things in person... tonight, I just talk about the aforementioned topics.)

Occasionally on the spur of a moment, I decide to fill my head with trash in the form of chick flicks and love songs.
It is my opinion that...

A. Chick flicks are Girl Porn.
and
B. Love Songs are an emotional roller coaster waiting to happen.

CHICK FLICKS = GIRL PORN

Take a minute and humor me... I found a few paragraphs that compare the two...

“Porn is an entertainment medium severely lacking in artistic integrity generally intended for males to indulge their out-of-control physical lusts. It creates the intense feelings of sex without the added complications of a relationship. It is the product of a society that replaces integrity and morals with immediate gratification that bears (seemingly) none of the consequences. But we find that this selfish gratification soon becomes an addiction, and creates unrealistic expectations of sexual health and competence, which often results in broken relationships (even marriages).

Chick flicks are also an entertainment medium generally lacking in artistic integrity (recycled plots, poor scriptwriting and acting) intended to create the intense emotions of being in love and indulge emotional lust when a relationship is not available or one that is fails to supply such feeling. They, also, are the product of a society that idealizes immediate gratification (we rarely see the hard work required for a relationship to work – just the good stuff), and minimize harm to others. The intense romantic feelings created, in conjuction with “perfect” male and female leads, create unrealistic romantic expectations for the target audience. If a relationship fails to look like the romances of film, if the all-too-familiar feelings cease, the relationship must not be “right.”

Now I am not suggesting that romantic comedies are as morally objectionable as pornography. I am just pointing out similarities between the two forms of “entertainment.” Both porn and romance films let people indulge in desires for a short amount of time, and over indulgence leads to unrealistic expectations within relationships.”

While they might be cute and funny... sweet and romantic... they aren't smart for the single gal... (or the taken one... but I can speak only from experience so will only address the single-hood) Chick flicks place you in a vulnerable state that is only enhanced when you are single. You watch what looks to be this AMAZINGG, romantic, wonderful relationship shared between jason statham and his co... and because (of course) he's GORGEOUS, you begin thinking 'Well... this is what it should be like... men need to be at my beck and call... and be sweet ... and kind... and sensitive... and emotional... and romantic... and want to rub my feet... and come running every time I call... They should forgo their friendships, family, job and only focus on me..." Right?

But what we fail to see is that after the camera stops rolling, the real world begins- And all those actors were all just playing a part... in an effort to take your money. **DISCLAIMER** I realize that not all people are alike... I'm talking about the general public and a lot of the people I've seen and met.... In the real world though, men- AREN'T PERFECT... women... AREN'T perfect... Men can't tell what you're thinking... unless you tell them... AND from what I've heard, they're just as clueless about you, as you are them... They aren't handed a secret "Men's Handbook to Women" the day they reach maturity.
Chick flicks create in women a false emotional ideal of romance and marriage. To make matters worse, GOOD LUCK GUYS... cause let's be honest... you'll never compare to Mr. Darcy or Jason Statham (in like.. anything he does ;-))... which is yet another downfall of the chickflick... 'women end up comparing men to fictional heroes and disregarding the qualities that are actually important-- faith, character, regard for others-- in favor of physical attraction or chemistry.'

 I realize that some girls out there will greatly disagree, and inevitably begin throwing a little hissy fit, but really?!? Slap yourself upside the head, take a step back, and re-evaluate...

All in all, I guess the biggest problem I have is the fact that when I watch one of these films I typically begin to struggle with loneliness and being impatient with God and His timing. I struggle and am consumed with "singleness"... and want a quick fix... and am vulnerable to ditch my top important standards...

And therefore... I try to avoid it at all costs...
If you know what your weaknesses are.... why on earth would you tempt yourself?? I'm not saying that I never watch them, cause I still do... and You've Got Mail is one of my favs... However, I am very careful in how many and how often I watch.

I may never have Mr. Darcy.. or Jason... or Vin... or Morgan from Criminal Minds...
but that's okay.
Because I'll have something better.
IF I'm patient and faithful to my Maker.

I'll have the man GOD picked out for me. In HIS timing.
I'll have a man who seeks after God's own heart.
I'll have a MAN, not a boy.
I'll have a man who falls in love with the Jesus in ME...
I'll have a man who values the treasure I am.
I'll have a man who knows my heart...
I'll have a man who knows everything about me... and still loves me.
I'll have a man who makes me laugh.
I'll have a man who will be brave enough to meet my brothers-- before the wedding...haha...
I'll have a man who-
respects me.
supports me.
CHALLENGES me in my walk with Christ.
and so much more...
In other words...
Darcy and Jason won't even begin to compare to the love God chooses for me :-)
And while I still struggle,
it's really not that bad... not that bad at all. Because the comfort I find in knowing that God knows EXACTLY who is it... makes my heart happy.

A few years ago, Tony Nutter said some of the most sage words to me ever... that right now at this very moment God is molding, creating, preparing my future husband for me... AND at THIS VERY MOMENT... God is molding, creating, and preparing ME for MY FUTURE HUSBAND.

Straight from the book----
"Don't excite love, don't stir it up, until the time is ripe-- and you're ready..."

"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires."

Song of Solomon (Message and NIV translations)



P.S. If you don't agree, that's fine... no rain on my parade.. haha...
BUT. If you're interested in discussing my perspective, I'd love to meet up and talk.

With lots of love, Kristina.

i'll take the background... You take the lead.

i have been convicted recently of the following…

Sometimes we become so enamored with a certain style of ministry that God has equipped us with, that  we are prone to inaccurately believe that that one mode is how we will serve God till death. We fail to see that while God never changes, we aren’t God but rather humans; that reside on an earth prone to change.
We can become SO consumed with an illogical idea that ministry can only happen in one specific way that we can miss the glory of God who works through all ways great and small. The problem is that if we envision our ministry in this one prescribed fashion, we can very easily can miss a chance to minister ((that God Himself may have provided)) … sometimes, that chance- might even be staring us in the face.
It seems that we get so caught up in our ’importance’ in God’s plan, that we fail to remember that we are, in fact, just a reflection of Christ- and nothing more without Him.

We are the moon… here to shine brightly on the earth, but fall into the background in the light of the morning [Son].

Maybe it’s time to sit down…and think… just STOP- and think…
God, am I really allowing you to run the show?

Close to the end of summer, i heard an incredible Lecrae song... that spoke profoundly to what's been on my mind...

~It's evident You run the show, so let me back down. You take the leading role, and I'll play the background. I know I miss my cues, know I forget my lines I'm sticking to Your script, and I'm reading all Your signs.

 

I don't need my name in lights. I don't need a starring role. And why gain the whole wide world, if I'm just gon' loose my soul. And my ways ain't purified, I'll live according to Your Word. I can't endure this life without Your wisdom being heard.

Prayin' the whole world will start embracing stage fright. So let me fall back and stop giving my suggestions Cause when I follow my obsessions I end up confessing. That I'm not that impressive, matter of fact I'm who I are. A trail of star dust leading to the Superstar.

I know I'm safest when I'm in Your will and trust Your word. And I know I'm dangerous when I trust myself, my vision blurred. And I ain't got no time to play life's foolish games.~

i don't even know how to close, because there is still so much to say. 

i just... couldn't and can't continue living a life comfortable in where i was.

God called me to great things when He called me to ministry long ago. 

And i don't know what that will look like... but i know i'm ready and willing.

AND MAN.... has the past week been intense. 

Really God? Have You seriously called me to help plant a church? WHERE DID THIS COME FROM? 

This. Is. Real. Life.

 no joke...

This. Is. Real. Life.

 i've packed up my things, and moved to Winchester, Virginia to serve as the children's minister for a new church plant (click it... it'll open in a new window) that will be launching this September 16th. As for now, i have no job to help supplement my income, but i am faithful and have been quite diligently searching.

AND BASICALLY... everyone's first or second question to me the past three days has been...

How are you feeling?

Honestly? i feel uncomfortable. Just flat out uncomfortable. i moved in to the Osbournes' house on Saturday... Saturday night i slept like a baby... (for about every twenty minutes..lol.. at which point i would wake up and realize it's still night time... dagnabbit). Sunday morning i said goodbye to my mom, who went back to Philippi feeling a lot more relaxed and relieved having seen Winchester and reconnecting with the Osbournes again. Watching her leave honestly was a little difficult because it meant that there's no turning back now. haha... This. Was. Real. 

Traveling to the Church @ Martinsburg (the church commissioning us) for their Sunday service was incredible. Shay spoke about missions and church planting, and there were a few folks that spoke about the recent mission trips they had been on. Listening to them brought me comfort as i could relate to some of the feelings they had experienced. And so to answer the question...just keep reading...

Worship.

 

Wow. Just wow. It was as if God had placed all the right songs on the leader's heart... as if God Himself was telling me EXACTLY what i needed to hear... and through it i was able to confirm that this--((right here, right now))-- is truly exactly where God has placed me, and where He needs me. i am humbled that He would choose me... but oh so blessed to be the chosen one. i felt so close to Christ... i felt as if i were holding His hand... singing to Him the praises He so loftily deserves. And along came the tears... not of sadness or anxiety; but sheer awe of God's glory. ((Is this REAL? Am i really here? Is this really happening...?.... YES) So how am i feeling? i feel blessed. i feel humbled. i feel uncomfortable. i feel excited. For one of the first times in my life, i feel as though i have made a decision that i did not even make. That God made. i feel as though i am answering the call He has placed in my heart, and i am eagerly anticipating the lessons He will teach me- and the growing i will do over the next few weeks... even months. Even though i have tried,  i feel as though these words, that no words, can truly even begin to describe how i am feeling...

One of the songs on Sunday basically talked about the fact that Jesus gave His life for mine, and so now i am giving mine to Him.

How incredible it was to sing that.  Jesus died... so that i can live eternally... it almost makes too much sense that now i will die to my life, to serve God on His earth.

Fred Hammond sings a song...

~I counted up the cost--it's more than fair
Even right down to the cross that I must bear
You gave Your life to me, So I'll give mine to You
Without Your power, I just could not make it
All of my life's struggle, wouldn't be able to take it 
My desire is to please You, that's what I do~

Tomorrow my work will begin at 8:00 am.  Shay will begin laying out what will be happening for the next few weeks, as well as the work that i will need to begin doing.

So how can you help?

Pray. Just pray.

Pray for the Church at Winchester.

Pray for the families that have committed to the calling God has placed on their hearts. (i met them today, one word... AMAZING). 

Pray that the hearts of the lost in Winchester will begin to soften.

Pray for me. Pray that God continues to work in my heart and ministry. Pray for focus and determination. 

Just. Pray.

With love in Christ,
-k

 ^1-2The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd. (Hebrews 11:1)